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 Parents can help make schools safer
Despite tragic shootings that have made national headlines, it’s important to remember that our nation’s schools usually are safe places where kids can learn and grow. Contrary to what you might hear in the media, since the early 1990s, there actually have been fewer violent crimes at schools. However, the potential for violence always exists. As a parent, you can play a role in preventing violence and bullying at your child’s school.
Concerned about your child’s safety?
Your first priority is likely to help your child stay safe. These tips may help you get started:
Get involved at school and in your community. Ask teachers and staff what’s being done to keep kids safe and how you can help. Consider volunteering at the school, working with a parent-teacher group or joining a neighborhood association that works to put a stop to violence.
Tune in. Listen to your children, and make efforts to talk with them each day about whatever is on their mind. Are there problems with other kids at school? Is anyone being bullied? Watch for signs of trouble, such as falling grades, loss of friends, mood swings or attempts to avoid school. Find out who your child can talk to at school, such as a teacher or counselor, if a violence issue arises.
Keep tabs on computer use. Be aware that bullying occurs on cell phones — often in the form of text messages — and the Internet. Ask your kids what they do online and who they chat with. Know what social networking sites, such as Facebook, MySpace or Twitter, your child belongs to. Teach them to be cautious about sharing information.
Be alert to your child’s activities and friends. Know where your children are, what they’re doing and who they spend time with.
Educate your child about bullying. Whether it involves teasing, threats or hitting, bullying can have serious consequences for the bullied child, including depression and damaged self-esteem. If your child is being bullied, consider these ways to respond provided by the Substance Abuse & Mental Health Services Administration:
- Make sure children know that being bullied is not their fault.
- Let your children know that they don’t have to face being bullied alone. Tell them to report bullying immediately to a trusted adult.
- Teach ways of responding to bullies. For instance, tell your child not to react, but to walk away and get help if pursued.
- Contact the school and report what’s happening. Talk with teachers and other school staff to find solutions. If the situation doesn’t get resolved, consider contacting the police.
Concerned about your child’s conduct?
No parent wants to hear that his or her child has been bullying other children, but it can happen. You may be able to play a role in preventing violent behavior. Consider these suggestions:
Discuss violence with your child. Listen to his or her concerns. But, make it clear that you won’t tolerate violent behavior. Discuss the consequences of fighting and bullying, such as getting hurt and hurting others.
Be clear and consistent about rules. Explain to your child what the consequences will be for breaking rules, and follow through. This helps promote self-discipline, a skill that will help your child choose acceptable behaviors at school and throughout life.
Encourage your kids to avoid name-calling and teasing. This type of verbal behavior may turn physical. A victim of teasing may see violence as the only solution.
Help kids develop problem-solving skills. Teach your children nonviolent ways to handle anger and resolve conflict, such as taking a moment to gather their thoughts and talking calmly and clearly about problems.
Know the risks of keeping guns at home. If you choose to keep firearms in the house, lock up the guns and ammunition separately.
Be a role model. Settle your own conflicts and handle anger without violence.
For more resources, visit the Stop Bullying Now Campaign at www.stopbullyingnow.hrsa.gov and the National Youth Violence Prevention Resource Center at www.safeyouth.org.
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Parenting pointers are a click away
For more parenting tips, including hints for talking with kids, visit myuhc.com. Click “Health & Wellness,” and then “Lifestyles” and “Parenting.”
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